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The Power Of Letting Go!
In today’s podcast (episode 17) ‘The Power of Letting Go!’ we will be discussing forgiveness, who benefits from forgiveness and why should sexually abuse survivors even consider forgiving their abuser.
We understand the pictures conjured up by the very word forgiveness and the immediate resistance that jumps to the surface. But for us, when we replaced the word ‘forgiveness’ with ‘letting go’ it made it a lot easier to explore the possibilities of taking that step.
We are not suggesting that if you choose to go down the path of forgiveness that your abuser or any abuser is forgiven for their actions, or that they do not suffer the consequences of those actions. Being held accountable is a vital part of moving forward. Rather we want you to think of exactly who is suffering by you holding onto the pain and suffering that your abuser caused.
We all struggled with the concept of forgiveness for a long time and for each of us this step meant different things at different times in our lives. We understand that letting go of your past although essential, is not easy and is more of a process that happens in layers. However, we know that allowing our dad to continue to take up space in our heads wasn’t hurting him but was in fact, destroying us.
The word forgiveness itself was a barrier to us moving forward as it conjured up images of sitting with him and playing happy families and to us that was inconceivable. But forgiving someone does not require that you ever have to have them in your life. Over time and through many discussions we realised just how much of our own precious time was taken up with thoughts of him.
We each discovered our own way of letting him go. Letting go of all pain and suffering that he caused was a vital part of our recovery. This is not something that happens easily or quickly, but in the letting go we allowed space for healing.
We hope by sharing our experiences we can demonstrate that not only is forgiveness possible but necessary for your healing. The one who benefits the most from letting go is YOU, not him. You deserve to move forward unencumbered by the past. Forgiveness or letting go will provide you with the opportunity to live a life you were meant to live, free from pain.
Please share and spread the word……
Joyce, June and Paula